It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize