I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
