Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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