Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
