glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.