We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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