Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize