haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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