Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
