There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
