if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
