just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize