Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
