He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
