Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
