All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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