Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
