its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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