onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
