he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
