That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
