Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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