I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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