My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
