Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
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