If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Randomize