You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
