Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Will exercising make me less horny?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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