Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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