I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
we made out on top of his cat.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Randomize
