Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
