D3 body, D1 cock
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
