This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
