who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
