ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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