Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Randomize
