And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
