some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
