my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
she peed on how many people?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
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