it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize