so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Pappa wants mamma naked
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
tonight lets celebrate not being married
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
