part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
