Betty ford says i'm here all night
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
The air was thick with penises
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
