you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
