Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
