yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
