grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
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