Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
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