i jhust puked up my retainher.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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