i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
